A Hero Is Born

Afternoon Delight

Pentel 0.7 mm graphite lead on 3 X 3 blue Post-it

Dreams

Do you ever some days, just wish you were a Colombian Drug Lord?

Wombat Mobsters Look Like Uncle Buck

Cupcake Icon

I wanted to make a cupcake icon, and after hours of trying to figure out how to make icons... I finally did, and it made me happy.

Cow

Lips

It's a pair of lips...but whose....?

Barnett Order

Blue Pilot G-2 Ink on Legal Note Pad

Awesomness

This is a true story about the dinner I ate tonight.

Glitter is Unstoppable

Despite working on my glittery craft outside, there is still glitter all over the couch, myself, the floor, and the desk. There is no keeping it contained!!

Domo Arigato

Expo Dry Erase Marker on Whiteboard

Well Hello There...

Web Colors Are Less Than Awesome

I Photoshopped a new desktop image. It looks much better in millions of colors...

Dragons Standing In Will Call

Blue is Better

This is a look into our relationship with out biggest and most ongoing argument...

Robo Dragoon

PET Necklace

This is a bit more of a craft, than an art. A PET bottle necklace based on the link sent to me on twitter by Chris (@cwashenberger).








tools of the trade














colored strips of a former Diet Pepsi bottle















blow-dried into beads
















finished product

Fridge Monster

The "Club"

So, ladybug and I have been living in Denver now for almost four years now and we have been very pleased with the bar scene here. Lots of good happy hour deals, great patios to watch the crazies walk by, deliciously large slices of pizza, tons of live music; this list could go on. Normally we go to one bar and stay there and drink and go home and drink or the home of someone else. Sometimes we'll go to a different bar if something exciting is going on but usually that seems to be it.

Anyway about a week ago I get a text from a friend of mine who I used to work with at Coors and everyone from my old department wanted to go out and they wanted me to come with. I said yes and he informed me that they were going to go "Bar Hopping." Something thefreedictionary.com defines as 'v. Slang - To patronize a series of bars during an evening.' and something that occurs often in South Dakota.

I remember my friend from Coors talking about how he always wanted to go to the clubs downtown because that's where all the "sexy white women" were at so I started to feel a little reluctant about going but I thought, "What the hell! It should be fun." So Saturday night comes and the Posse and I catch The E Line downtown and head for Market St.

Me 'n The Posse

The evening starts off quiet with the Rockies game going on, and the sun still setting. We go to some bar called Spill. We pounded Newcastles and made fun of The Dave Mathew's Band videos that were playing inside. After about two beers we went to an Irish bar across the street where we indulged in the PBRs and Irish Car Bombs that were on special. After a few more drinks we head across the street again and one of the people in our group said, "Hey! This place is pretty good." and he started to head inside. This is where I feel as though the evening took a turn.

If you are ever on 15th and Market and feel like taking in an *ahem* club, then Lavish is the place for you. We had to walk though the little zig zaggy rope where there were two girls telling people on the street this is the place to be and we approached the security and looked like a Shaft on steroids if he joined the CIA. They eyeballed us all up and down several times and the two people wearing baseball caps had to take them off; the dude wearing the fedora got to keep his on. We walk into a long foyer where there is a small bar, the bar tenders are wearing weird neon glasses that a five year old girl might wear.

A girl in a black cocktail dress approaches us.

"Hi if you guys were thinking of getting a drink I could possibly help you out with that," she says in a way that made it sound like we were not coming in for a drink; it was weird to me. I'm still trying to take in the whole club while people are ordering. I'm not really paying attention and she gets to me. At this point a small part of me died that I'm sad to say I will not be able to forget.

"What would you like?" she asks.

"Gee, I dunno," I say trying to look over at the bar quick to see what they had, wishing she would leave me alone and I could just go over there and order something despite the bartenders which I'm finding a little frightening. "Umm...what do you have on tap?"

"Tap?" She says looking a little confused. I look back at her and her face changes from confused to why did you just kill all of those baby bunnies, "I...I don't think we do...tap..."

I'm sure at this point my face is also going through some pretty peculiar changes and I'm trying to force some sort of words out of my mouth to show her my brain had not completely shut down at this very sad point. Not sad that they don't have a tap, but that this is some sort of magical, mythical concept to this girl.

"Just give me a rum and coke." I manage to say quickly and she walks away, I continue to take in the bar. My first thought is it's a gay bar. There were no women, despite the skankily dressed women outside trying to attract us like overly used sirens, but what the hell.

At the end of the foyer there is the DJ booth, with a DJ I assume has some sort of muscular disorder by the way his neck was turned (imagine someone holding a phone to their ear without their hands), he never moved his head and looked very intense listening to music with one headphone on. There is another long foyer where there are leather couches and what looks like a couple of 40 year old women trying to hook up with black men, and a staircase at the end of the foyer we were in with a group of people that would be best described as Persians standing at the top of it.

I lean on a small black table waiting for my drink to come and more crazy looking security dudes walk up to me and say, "We need you to move. It's time to get ready." They pick up the table and whisk it away behind a small black curtain. I grow a little more concerned but by that time my cocktail comes and thank God it's strong.

We all start talking and I'm feeling more comfortable and we head up the stairs where there is a larger bar and a large group of people that all looked like The Real World and Jersey Shore rejects. I take a large drink of my rum and coke. I find the bathroom and go inside. The attendant also looks like one of the security dudes and it makes me feel like I better wash my hands or this guy is going to break me in two and make an example out of me.

I come out and look down into the main foyer. Within the minute and a half I was in the bathroom it filled up with the sluttiest glow stick covered skanks I had ever seen. They all crawled out of the suburbs to go clubbing at Lavish. I feel dirty, I take another drink. We all talk a little more and decide it's time to leave.

We start to push our way through the gauntlet of middle aged and what looks like under aged women; all wearing skirts shorter than they should, which start attracting all the ethnic, cologne drenched men to them. Then, Lady GaGa's Poker Face comes on. The abomination of people cheer and the crowd becomes insane (as if it wasn't already). We made it out, but barely, and I feel like I left part of me behind...maybe my innocence. We decided to find a place with pool tables and continued on our way.

I had never been to what someone would call a "club" before, and I'm not sure if I'll go back.